Just for kicks - Starbursts Should be Outlawed

Stores aren't the only  busy places this time of year as people shop until they drop - it's also a pretty productive season for movie theaters.  I thought I'd share a blog posted originally posted on my website back in March of this year, just for kicks.  Enjoy.

starbursts.jpg starburst image by dancerkj1351

Starbursts Should be Outlawed - Pet Peeve #3
Originally posted on March 30, 2009

This has been a major annoyance of mine for some time now, but when Lovemuffin & I went to the coast for his birthday a couple of weeks ago I vowed I would post this on my blog. (I just finally got around to it.)

It has come to my attention recently (thanks, honey!) that it is not “normal” to be annoyed constantly by loud noises, constant movement, or repetitive phrases.  I can honestly say that I thought I was one of many who got extremely annoyed & distracted after a time of hearing someone say “you know” after each & every sentence - or who fights with all of her might not to give a sly elbow-jab after her husband has been wiggling around for over ten minutes during the sermon - or who wants to just turn around in the theater and stare down the person who won’t stop poppin’ the popcorn and is crunching away with their mouths open during the most crucial scenes. 

I really, truly thought that I was normal. Come to find out, according to Lovemuffin, those things don’t bother most people. And I cannot, for the life of me, understand why. (Well in Lovemuffin’s case, it’s because he’s been on construction equipment for over 15 years already...he's practically deaf already.) Which leads me to pet peeve #3...

Eating starbursts during a movie.

What in the world possessed the movie theater franchise to think that starbursts during movies was a good thing?  I mean, they could have a few wrapper-less pieces in a little baggie (like gummy bears) or something...but instead, they sell these big, hard to open bags that make lots of noise (notice no one is ever in the mood for their candy until it’s a suspenseful part?) and they fill them with tons of air so that they can make as much noise as possible as they’re being opened.

It’s the most important line of the movie - you’re all into it -  it could be just you and the big screen you’re so sucked in...“You can’t handle the--” **crinkle crinkle crinkly crinkly crinkle**  “What? What did he say?????  Whaaaaat????”

UGH it drives me nuts. And one, right after the other, right after the other gets eaten...I seriously think they cram like 20 into those bags.  After the first two crinkly crinkles, forget the movie, all I can do is sit there and shoot daggers with my eyes at the person doing it, wondering if they really truly DON’T HEAR how loud they are. And they never seem to notice.  (I won’t even go there about popcorn...and the fact that most people think that closing their mouths while eating popcorn is an impossibility. It’s not! And I can prove it!)

So do me a favor, my readers - the next time you are at a movie, think of me and my oversensitive ears.  Don’t get starbursts. Or if you do, stick them in your purse, or under your jacket and open them there. Heck - you can even do it while you’re walking to your seat! And I bet you’ll be amazed at how much easier it is for YOU to hear the best parts of the movie too!


Davin Malasarn said...

Ha, funny post! I've started going to concerts where announcers ask the audience to unwrap their candy ahead of time. It's a great idea that movie theaters should do as well.

Jessica L. Brooks (coffeelvnmom) said...

Hmm... I wonder if I could petition the theaters to do that around here... lol

Anonymous said...

I am not a fan of starburst in general, but the idea of opening your snack before the movie starts is excellent. Of course, I don't usually take candy to a movie. I'll frequently smuggle in fish tacos and tiny bottles of wine.

Patricia Stoltey said...

And people who chew gum with their mouths open -- you don't get the "crinkle, crinkle," but gum chewing goes on and on and on.....

Jessica L. Brooks (coffeelvnmom) said...

I'm always riding on my middle daughter for that one, Patricia!

Anita said...

My starburst days are over...well maybe not; I'll get desperate about once a year and steal one from the kids.
It is rather lotud and sloshy. :)